Every transformation in life begins with one thing:
A doubt. The doubt of what you are thinking about your self, about others or about the world might not be true.
Up until I was 17 years old I was convinced that I was ugly. I felt too skinny, my hair was too thin and I didn’t like my face or my freckles. I remember when I was a little girl before falling asleep I was praying to wake up the next morning and be pretty. I wanted long, black, straight hair, blue eyes and a more beautiful smile.
It was a sleepless night on a train on the way back from a school trip from France to Austria when someone I had just met asked me if I was a model.
With an inner laugh about the ridiculousness about me being a model I left the conversation at some point and I found myself standing in front of a mirror for quite a while.
Instead of repeating the usual judging thoughts about my self that went on in my head I just looked into the mirror and remained in silence. In this moment of stillness I began to doubt those judgements and I began to wonder if I was actually prettier than I believed myself to be.
That night on the train and actually the whole trip to France changed how I had perceived myself.
I remember clearly how I was thinking on the way there: “No one knows me in this country and I am leaving in a week, no one will ever see me again, so I can be who I really am!”
It took me another 3 years until I got into Life Coaching when I realised that (my) looks didn’t matter as much as I thought. I had another insight that again turned my perception about myself and the world around:
I started to understand that the fact that I am alive, that I breathe, my pure and raw existence in this world makes me valuable and worthy of love. And not just me but everybody else, too.
We all once were babies who pooped in diapers, who couldn’t speak or walk or do anything and yet whenever one of those giant people looked at us their eyes lit up with love and they cared for us – day and night.
Part of us still is this little, fragile human being, our bodies might have grown but the essence, this innocent and clear presence still resides within us and it will never leave.
We might not be aware of this presence, of our own worth, as it’s hidden underneath judgements, insecurities, fears and pain we collected along the way as we grew up.
But if you allow yourself to spend a moment in silence and consider that what you think or believe about your self, about the world, or about others
might not be is not true, if you allow yourself a moment of doubt, you can transform your life in an instant.